piss poor update and a half to be continued when I feel like writing…

Dear Internet,

Where did we leave off?

I was in Tucson broke and homeless living out of sheds, school buses, and broken down RVs. I took all of the money I scraped together dancing at one of the worst clubs in that town to take a train to LA, sleep in an airport for a day or two to get hassled by the cops for looking like a terrorist to get drunk as hell before getting  on a plane back to Australia, a place which has turned into somewhat of a financial promised land for me. Australian customs gave me a hell of a time, they went through all of my luggage, every single thing and even read my journal and medical papers I had with me. I happened to have a copy of Laura Augustin’s Sex at the Margins which lead to more questioning and me being lead to a small white room where I was questioned for over an hour about my mental health, line of work and family situation. I’m sure you’re smart enough to figure out what the lesson here is…

Not fun. So to all the people that bug me to keep a journal or record of events because my life is oh so interesting, fuck off, reality says its just more evidence for customs officials, cops and whoever else to condem, arrest and prosecute you with.

I whored for four months there, took some time off visited friends in Sydney, went to a wicked festival, made some bad porn, took some OK photos, scored a one page spread in People Magazine (Australia) , then went back to work. Finally after a few bad nights with men that were beyond any help I could give them and a coworker stealing from me, I impulsively bought a plane ticket to Dublin. After being in the air for twenty two hours I finally landed in Ireland, my first time in the UK in over ten years since I lived in Scotland. I stayed with a friend there for a couple weeks where we basically fell back into our familiar relationship.

We met in honors classes in freshman year of highschool and she’s still one of my bestest buddies even though she has zero respect for the work I do, she’s been there when I needed her and I’m so grateful for our relationship and I love her to death. We went to the Dublin Writers Museum, saw Oscar Wilde’s statue, walked around St. Stephen’s Green and then took a bus ride to the Cliffs of Moher over in Galway.

She took me to her giant corporate office where I saw the otherside: what would have happened if I had maybe graduated from highschool and gotten a “normal” job. I didn’t like it.

But maybe I don’t like anything, maybe I’m just a disagreeable bitch that will never find a place, job or line of work that makes me happy. Her office cafeteria made me anxious, giant crowds of twenty something IT dorks milling around…reminded me of the one year of highschool we went to together. No thanks…

Leaving Dublin I flew to Asheville, NC and then Hot Springs to check out a little piece of land that I found on the internets but unfortunately it was too vertical and under an HOA anyways. Boo. So the hunt continues…

I left Asheville by bus and then Charlotte by train all the way to Florida where I left my car almost a year before (long story which may someday make an interesting chapter in my fictional memoir). My trail daddy flew down from NY and we drove to Ocala National forest to camp with some other hiker trash (RYDER!!!) and then onto Amicalola Falls State Park where I left my little spaceship of love, again, to go hiking on the AT.

This time we did the approach trail, which is pointless and I recommend it to no one. Walking up stairs does not count as hiking to me, training perhaps, but not hiking. The second day I took a zero because it was freezing cold and there was ice on the trees and I was feeling like a pouty princess. I was already ready to give up and I couldn’t believe that I had dragged myself out there again. But then, a girl with pretty red hair and bright blue eyes came into the shelter and we started talking. This was her first attempt at a thruhike and she said she cried when she saw her first white blaze because she was finally making a lifetime dream of her’s into a reality. She had always wanted to hike the AT and now she was finally doing it. I felt like the biggest most cynical ungrateful cunt in the entire world in that moment. We became friends, her hiking partner gave me a swig of whiskey and later on when I ran into her she told me I had nice boobs. I didnt know what to say, I get so tongue tied around women I’m attracted to its silly. Not to genderize (not a word I know) things but at this point in time I would like to date a lady. Although I *love* the cock, I’m craving something else…

So the next morning I got my ass up and hiked to Woody Gap camped for a night and then hiked into Neels Gap. Memories memories memories and as Teen Wolf put it I saw ghosts of ourselves from three years ago hiking, sweating, smoking and laughing our asses off all over the place. During the second day when I was freezing my ass off I ran into a lady hiking southbound that I met in 2010, she was so nice and gave me the gloves off her hands and an extra hat she had. I started sobbing after she hiked away because it was such a nice reminder of the kindness and brother/sisterhood you see on the trail. People look out for eachother out there like no where else I have seen, and yes that sentence sucks grammatically please feel free to correct it in the comments…lol

At Neels Gap I stayed at the hostel and got drunk and met a nice boy that I hiked with for a couple months till Virginia where I ran into Timon and G-Hippie doing trail magick and joined them on an  aqua blaze of the St James River then we joined up with another crew and attemped to canoe the South Fork to the Shenandoah (part of which I did three years ago). This time we borrowed canoes and kayaks from a local dude…

TO BE CONTINUED BIZNITCHES!

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