|
||
Price of Pleasure: Porn, Sexuality and Relationships Angela from ISM says: "I'm so glad that my folio could come in the nick of time for you! I wish you good luck in the debates that you're facing. I'm not an apologist for the entire industry but I can say from personal experience that porn is not inherently evil, degrading or dehumanizing! I LOVE expressing and sharing myself sexually AND I'm a committed feminist with a BA majoring in Gender Studies!" So I’m not really sure how to handle this post. I saw this movie with a group, so part of my review of the movie is kind of lumped in with the group’s reaction. A week or so ago, the Night Heron grassroots activism center aired Price of Pleasure: Porn, Sexuality and Relationships which had a bunch of assholes in it, including my arch nemesis. When I first saw that they were playing that movie at the Night Heron, I assumed (stupidly) that they were going to slam it, kind of like when they showed one of the first movies at the White House that was totally racist. I knew I was wrong when I walked into the door and was immediately WARNED that I was about to witness potentially disturbing footage. “Of porn?” I thought to myself. I knew I was definitely wrong when she she stated happily that she loves Robert Jensen and Gail Dines. I knew I must have been crazy to think that these people would be open minded enough about an industry they know NOTHING about when I watched one of the girls hiding her face and cowering at PORN. But just in case they weren’t knowledgeable enough about the porn industry, I decided to make a good porn list and print it out for them. When I passed the list out after the movie, these kids couldn’t WAIT to get this list out of their hands while laughing like typical middle-schoolers. So a group of people that are obviously embarassed by open sexuality are trying to have a discussion about pornography (the display of human sexuality on film, no less) and I’m the asshole. Yeah ok. This documentary sucks for many reasons. The journalism is a joke, if I didn’t know better I would think that its produced by Fox News, because they’re always “fair and balanced”. Not to mention outdated, the host of the event said it was made in ’05, which in porn years is pretty old. The industry has changed a lot since then, they didnt’ mention Sasha Grey or Queer Porn or anything else that is fabulous that porn has to offer. Alot of the scenes were taken out of context, that many of those scenes feature BDSM. They showed a couple of kink.com’s sites, but only the ones that feature male domination and female submissives even though the same site features male submission and female domination! The host of the event actually had to ask me what BDSM meant. Yet here she is leading this group to join other anti-porn groups and she doesn’t even know who her enemy is. She is not familiar with sexuality enough to recognize the styles of an alternative lifestyle group. She is ignorant and yet she’s trying to “stop porn culture”, in MY TOWN. She doesn’t watch porn, but she wants to put me out of a job WITHOUT exploring the alternatives of a WIDE AND MULTI-FACETED INDUSTRY. I abhor that kind of ignorance. Especially when it affects my wallet. Because, you see, I am not an upper- Its not just about the money aspect of it, in one segment of the documentary Gail Dines states, “Just because I’m critical of McDonald’s doesn’t mean I’m against food!”. Then why is your organization called “Stop Porn Culture“? Why not start something? Or “stop rape culture”? Censorship of a subject has never gotten anyone anywhere. The problem is in our culture, those scenes wouldn’t sell if those ideas weren’t already present in our culture. If we started first by giving GOOD sex education to our youth, society would demand the porn industry to make a better product! So now I’m being chastised because during the documentary one of the “former porn performers” that they interviewed said something to the effect of “If the only thing a girl can do is shove toys up her hoohah, thats pretty sad” and I couldn’t help myself when I blurted out “What a fucking cunt! I cant’ believe she just said that!”, because it was offensive. The majority of my income comes from the internet and people either paying for my time on cam or buying my clips in which I’m masturbating and “shoving toys up my hoohah”. I think my line of work is much more honorable than being some corporate grunt, telemarketer, office bitch, POLITICIAN or what have you. But now, people that didn’t even bother attending the event are writing me and Hawk to tell us how rude and offensive we were during the event EVEN THOUGH THE PERSON HOLDING IT WAS TOTALLY OUT OF LINE WHEN SHE MADE SEVERAL STATMENTS ABOUT HOW WOMEN WHO THINK ITS EMPOWERING TO BE A SEX OBJECT ARE STUPID, “oh yes and they’re trying to convince women that pole dancing is empowering, if the patriarchy hasn’t won that round, hahah”. That same person wrote me, after I commented on Hawk’s blog post about the event and said she wants to get together so that she can learn about sensitivity issues. Its not a sensitivity issue, lady, its your fucking whore stigma thats the problem. I’m so over this discussion, I’ve made my point several times to several people. I’ve written and rewritten this post in my head several times because I care about my message that much that I want people to get it. But its become obvious after listening and talking to many people they don’t want to get it, they’re happy in their little bubbles of ignorance. One person told Hawk in an email that we’d missed a great opportunity to share the beautiful side of the pornography industry, but here’s the thing: I offered at the end of this discussion to have a good porn night, I came there with my material but the person I was speaking to about it seemed mad hesitant to give me the go ahead. Its ok to have one offensive and controversial film that downs an entire industry and is totally insulting to its performers, but Goddess forbid if you’re actually happy with your job and want to share that with people. I think it would be useful if people wanted to actually learn about the big bad world of porn to ask a PORN PERFORMER, someone that has worked in the industry for a while (*cough cough* ME) in alternative and mainstream porn.
In closing, I would like to say that just because I’m for the porn industry in all of its glory does not mean I condone virtual child porn or am against women’s rights or for the degradation and humiliation of women (unless, of course thats your kink). What I am for is more sex education starting younger, like elementary school. Our culture needs to recognize that sexuality is very important and that your sexuality touches ever corner of your life. Education doesn’t hurt anyone and a more intelligent culture will demand a more intelligent product. Porn didn’t invent racism or degradation against women, those elements were already alive and aware before they started appearing in porn. Porn is simply another capitalistic enterprise that makes its dough off what the consumer wants to see, its simply a mirror of our culture. If you don’t like the way you look in the mirror, you don’t smash it, right? p.s. If anyone is up for a game of bingo, please give me a call! 14 comments to Price of Pleasure: Porn, Sexuality and Relationships |
 "Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I will meet you there..." -Rumi    The Dirty Girl Zine - first in a series about our cultural ideals regarding dirt/nature and sexuality.  Buy My Homemade Porn!   Support Independent Porn! "Pornography is supposed to arouse sexual desires. If pornography is a crime, when will they arrest makers of perfume? -Richard Fleischer"  Awesome, Artistic and Intelligent Erotica  A cute hairy girl that likes to masturbate and take nudie pics!   Natural, Hairy, Dreadlocked, Hemp Wearing, Barefoot, Earth-loving, Goddesses   Awesome Queer Strapon Porn for Everyone!  See me as "Sahara" on AbbyWinters.com  Solo, Girl Girl, Amateur  • See over a dozen teachers speak about sexuality, spirituality, and the role of the Sacred Prostitute in history and today • Learn about different cultural traditions of sacred sexuality in ancient and modern times • See teachers working with individuals, couples, and groups • Learn about the historic and mythological Mary Magdelene • Hear practical advice for those called to do this work Read my review of this documentary here.  Be a responsible pervert! Me too!
 I do too!   |
|
|
|
||
“She doesn’t watch porn, but she wants to put me out of a job WITHOUT exploring the alternatives of a WIDE AND MULTI-FACETED INDUSTRY.”
That pretty much sums up a problem I have with a lot of anti-porn people… their idea of porn is simplistic and ignorant. How can you fight against something you know so little about? It scares me, honestly.
“Porn didn’t invent rascism or degradation against women, those elements were already alive and aware before they started appearing in porn. Porn is simply another capitalistic enterprise that makes its dough off what the consumer wants to see, its simply a mirror of our culture. If you don’t like the way you look in the mirror, you don’t smash it, right?”
Awesome. Mind if I quote you in my blog at some point?
Great entry. I kind of want to see this documentary but at the same time, I sense it might rot my brain.
thanks! I don’t mind at all quote/link away!
That kind of idiocy makes my head hurt. Bravo to you being able to survive it unscathed.
thanks! I try not to let the bastards get me down
An interesting (to me) aside: The photos, to me, do not “arouse the prurient interests” and are not erotic at all. Yet the anti-sexuality brigade would try to call them obscene… I also consider “anti-porn” to be code for anti-sexuality and often anti-sensuality. These often are the same people who prefer McDonalds’ or generic-ginormous-steak-place over actual food. (I’m a meat eater, and I honestly consider what is served at those places an abomination, an affront, an *insult* to nature.) Many of these folks eschew everything their body tells them, and they insist on dragging the rest of us and all of nature into their hell often in the belief that it’s heaven. I don’t even know how to communicate with them. I applaud your attempt and your continuing attempts. I simply would have walked out and never returned. Your engagement took courage and strength.
Another odd-ball thing that came to mind: When in Washington state, I stopped at one of the bikini espresso drive-throughs. It was convenient, and I was curious. And, honestly, the women were gorgeous. The coffee was *shockingly* good (for a drive-through or not, far better than most); I honestly thought they would be too worried about burning themselves. Ends up that the community housing this particular shop regularly rallies against the bikinis. Mind you, these bikinis are downright modest compared to those along the Gulf coast… But the real kicker is that the shop is catty-corner from a movie theater with coming feature posters. Some of those posters showed strapping men and scantily clad (or wetly clad) women surrounded by carnage and death. Anyone complain about those? Bueller? Bueller?
And yet another: The movie didn’t play any of the pre- and post-interviews from the kink.com shoots, did it? augh. It’s nuts. Almost always, the hottest scenes are accompanied by the most interesting interviews. And to find the kink.com clips, you *know* the watched *all* the interviews looking for anything to use. And they found…
Of course, there are abusive sexual depictions beside the good ones. There are bad cops among the good ones. There are horrible exploiters among the honest religious folk. There are dangerous drivers among the careful ones. No one remembers the good; everyone remembers the bad.
I am glad you hold fast and work towards better understanding. Thank you.
(Oh, and it’s not that “Angela from ISM” isn’t gorgeous. I just don’t see these images made with the intent to arouse so much as induce thinking deeply about non-erotic topics.)
Thanks for sharing, because I think even if you enlighten one person you’ve made a difference. Why are people so uptight and close minded. It drives me crazy. I think you are the bomb! Girl you have more sense and safistication than most with a college degree. You have balls, and I admire your mind and body.
x Laroo
Good article also liked your response to Robert Jenson. Great caption:
” No feminists were harmed in the making of this photo.” Which I think is the crux of the whole argument in that people have a choice if they wish to enter the adult entertainment industry. Freedom of choice which is what our modern society is supposed to be about. All men and women should have the right to enter sex work as long as they are of legal and not being coericed to do so.
I think things have gotten better with sex shops being more in the public eye but, we still have a long way to go in the content area. Adult movies though having been around since movie cameras were invented have really only had full length features for the last 40 years and as with any art form it takes time to develop and change the content therein. Thankfully there are more women controlling content then before but, this area still has a long way to go as well before things are on an even keel. As with all areas of mass entertainment the market place will be the area which decides what sells. It’s only been recently that Female Queer content has been acknowledged by the AVN awards in their nomination process. I also think that more natural looking women will be more acknowledged whether they be curvy or hairy etc…
I also think that you are a pioneer in that movement.
Every pioneer in their movement was either condemned, ridiculed, ostracized or otherwise deemed in person and deed as a detriment to society. Usually by hypocrites.
This piece is well armed. Each link is like a trip wire waiting for a porn nazi.
“I think my line of work is much more honorable than being some corporate grunt, telemarketer, office bitch, POLITICIAN or what have you.”
You are entitled to your opinion but I don’t find anything honorable in selling your body for money. I am a single mom w/ 2 kids. I am a waitress, my shift is from 8-7, six days a week and I attend night school five days a week. I am getting my degree in pharmacy so I can better myself and provide a better life for my children.
If I didn’t have sex work there is no way in hell I would have been able to support myself financially the way I have for THREE YEARS. If I didn’t have sex work, quite frankly, I’d probably be homeless or working three jobs or perhaps WWOOFing full time and not by choice.
-Sorry to say but you took the easy way out. There are other ways and means. I am A waitress. I serve food. I believe my profession is honorable.
Hi Karen,
I don’t buy into the whole single mother = martyr bullshit that many people do. I think you’re irresponsible and stupid for pushing out two kids without an established income. Shame on you.
Where’s the honor in bringing in two little souls so that you could put them through poverty and hunger? You’re lame.
This is not the easy way out. Try it, I dare you. You may be even able to properly provide for your kids.
You pretty much summed up my problems in the anarchist community. You are a zillion times braver and more engaged than me, tho. Good luck!
lets steal jensen’s computer and look up all the sordid barely legal zoo porn he whacks off to on a the daily.
people like him are always hiding something
“People who think porn is empowering are stupid.”
Hmmm. I don’t know if I ever thought it was empowering, but in my twenty years of that, and other areas of sex work, I found something I was good at, and made good money at.
Did I feel used, degraded? No, I could always say no to any particular act.
I don’t think it’s empowering, or degrading. It’s work, but work that some of us enjoy. Why make it more than that? We don’t have debates over if being a clerical worker, or hairdresser is empowering or degrading? Why is it only sex work we get all weird about.